Unfolding Beauty

The sooner we let go of holding on, the sooner we can hold on to the beauty of what’s unfolding before us. Nothing was ever meant to stay the same forever.

Julieanne O’Connor

And yet, I am a woman who deeply scorns change. I like to know what to expect.

Change can be troublesome, an unwelcome visitor. And in my experience, usually a surprise visitor at that.

No thank you. No soliciting here. I don’t want any change. I want to stay exactly the same.

I’m in a good season. I want my home life to stay like this. My marriage to stay at this level of connection and commitment. I am happy with my life. I am thriving in the routines I carefully set out for myself .

I want my children to stay where they are. I know what it means to parent them at these ages , right now. I don’t know what Ben will be like as a man. I don’t know what Elijah will be like as a driver. I don’t know what Josiah and Bella will be like as teenagers. Everyone please stay exactly as you are, thank you very much.

Let’s not change. Stay the same. Need me the exact amount you do right now.

But to refuse to change is to refuse to grow.

To resist their growing up is to resist them becoming fully alive to the people they were meant to be.

To resent my changing body, let’s face it … my aging body… is to let American Marketers win. If I am grumpy at each line that appears on my face , I am agreeing that Young and Thin is valuable and worthy , and that everything else is less than.

No ma’am. I have learned of the Japanese concept of Wabi Sabi. I first read of it in “Art and Faith” by Makoto Fujimura.

“Wabi sabi is an artistic sensitivity as much as an ephemeral feeling of beauty. It celebrates the passage of time and its sublime damages. In many art forms in Japan, this notion of prettiness through imperfection is present.”

Wabi Sabi encompasses the themes my brain has been wrapping around lately.

Change. Hope. Art. The passage of time. Well loved belongings.

Wabi Sabi is a slow, gently unfurling flower. As opposed to the mad, frantic, rushing train that I usually picture Change as.

This is comforting. And perhaps a bit more of a balanced way of viewing all that change and the passing of time encompasses.

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